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Battling the Earbud Blues

Do you have trouble making iPod earbuds stay in your ears? Does the least bit of exercise make them fall out?

Stuart Goldenberg

Devices for a better fit include, from top, the Earbudi, Comply foam tips and Yurbuds silicone covers.

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Do you suffer from crippling anxiety because you’re the only one in the room who can’t manage the simple act of wearing earbuds?

You are not alone. You, like thousands of other Americans, suffer from Earbud Cartilage Deficiency Syndrome (E.C.D.S.). A Google search for “can’t wear earbuds” returns only 93,800 results, but when I asked my Twitterfollowers who else had this problem, tons of them chimed in. (Yes, that’s the kind of rigorous scientific research I do.)

If you are small of ear, you may find that those one-size-fits-all earbuds simply don’t fit. They’re too big — or you’re too small — for satisfactory wedging.

Yet the cartilaginously well endowed may be E.C.D.S. sufferers, as well. Too big a socket, and those hard plastic discs, ungripped, simply fall out.

Or, like me, you might have been born without an antitragus. That’s the little lower-edge wall of cartilage that would hold earbuds in place. (I never knew of my hideous deformity until the invention of the iPod.)

Fortunately, there is hope. Treatment comes in all shapes, sizes, designs and materials. Indeed, these alternative earbuds may even appeal to the normal-eared, because let’s face it: standard earbuds can be uncomfortable. They are three things that your ears are not: hard, perfectly round and uni-size.

Here are the four categories of E.C.D.S. solutions. (I didn’t consider full-cup headphones, on the premise that they would diminish your reputation in public even further.)

EARBUD GRIPPERS The first approach is to fasten something onto your existing earbuds to make them grippier or more comfortable. Like EarBudis ($10), for example. (It’s pronounced “ear buddies.” Ear booties would be something else altogether.) They’re rubber over-ear hooks that snap onto standard Apple earbuds.

They do hold up the earbuds, but do nothing for their hard, round bigness. If they weren’t comfortable before, they won’t be now.

Comply Whoomps ($20 for two pairs) are narrow foam cylinder extensions for your existing earbuds. Again, the idea is to grip your ear canal more strongly without making you buy new earbuds. Unfortunately, although the foam is grippy, it becomes uncomfortable quickly.

Yurbuds ($20) are curved silicone funnels that snap onto standard cheapo earbuds. They make the earbuds softer, increase their grip and enhance the audio. You’re supposed to send a photo of a quarter next to your ear so that you order exactly the right size. They work great. However, for the antitragus-deprived even Yurbuds aren’t fallout-proof.

BUILT-IN HOOKS Another solution: earbuds with built-in, over-ear hooks. (They may interfere with glasses.)

Philips SHQ3000’s ($16) are bright orange waterproof earbuds. You can run in the rain, you can rinse them under the faucet, and you can sweat enthusiastically without short-circuiting. They come with a clothes clip (reduces cable strain so they won’t yank out), a carrying case and comfortable rubber-dome earbud tips in several sizes. Too bad the sound is so muffled.

Sony’s MDR J10 earbuds are even cheaper: $8. Sure, they’re chintzy plastic. But they hook nicely over your ear, positioning the integrated speaker bud without any cartilage assistance. The sound is surprisingly crisp and rich; you’d never guess they cost $8. (You’d guess $11 at least.)

Sony also makes the MDR AS20J ($13), whose black rubber “hook” doesn’t go just over your ear — it’s kidney-shaped, so it goes all the way around. This design is ideal for the antitragus-challenged; heck, these would stay on even if you were also missing yourtragus, scapha, concha and earlobe. They sound easily as good as the regular iPod earbuds.

Bang & Olufsen’s earhook earphones ($160) aren’t nearly as successful. They’re stylish, of course, and they adjust in three ways: the hook opens and closes, the earbud slides higher or lower, and the earbud rotates in or out. But the actual buds are hard, round disks like iPod’s, so they’re not comfortable. They also take a lot of fiddling to put on.

HEADBAND STYLE Sony’s streak of successful cheap plastic continues with the MDR AS35W ($20). It’s a foldable headband that bends the earbuds right into your ears. Incredibly lightweight (and cheap-feeling), they’re incredibly comfortable, and they would stay on even if you had no ears at all.

IN-EAR Audio aficionados reject the standard music player earbuds not because they fall out, but because they’re cheap and don’t sound very good. They’d much rather buy in-ear earphones, whose rubber or foam tips wedge all the way inside your ear canal.

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